How to get into the Cardinals game

1

Posted By

May 2nd, 2011
How to get into the Cardinals game

You could negotiate with a scalper, date a bullpen catcher, pretend to like your pretentious uncle with the gold chain and season tickets, hijack Fredbird’s costume, photoshop your name onto a press pass, undergo facial reconstruction to more closely resemble Bruce Sutter, become the organization’s first middle-aged batboy, develop a 96 mph fastball, Vulcan neck pinch a security guard or dig a “Shawshank” tunnel.

Or you could endure a game with a trust-fund baby or just pounce on the company tickets and bring the boss’s hot daughter to the game.

Maybe you should just go to McDonald’s.

Ticketfest is back.

TV

Radio
“Girl”

 

 

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